Well, we did it! Last night was Phoebe's first night...gulp...alone...sniff...in her crib...aaaggghhh! This was the first time she hasn't been within arm's length of me during the night since she was born! I was so nervous: what if her pacifier fell out? Who would reach over in a sleepy haze and shove it back in? What if she woke up scared and cried? Who would reach over in a sleepy haze and hold her hand? What if she coughed or sneezed or farted- who would hear her and peek over the side of the crib and check to make sure everything was ok? The video monitor IS awesome, but if only there was a teleporter attached...pause to cry and ask Matt a hundred times if everything would be ok...and cry some more...it acutally went really well, from Phoebe's perspective: I put her down at about 11:30, ran back to our bedroom, propped myself up on the pillows into a semi-sitting position so that my eyeballs were only a few inches away from the video monitor, cranked up the volume so I could hear each breath, and stared...and stared...and stared...until I somehow drifted off. She woke up and cried a little at 1:30, at which point I bolted out of bed, scooped up the pacifier, and had it back in her mouth in about 1.5 seconds...cry it out- ha! I hovered around the door to her room, wringning my hands, secretly hoping just a little bit that she would wake up again crying so I could have a good excuse to scoop her up and hold her and keep her safe...but she rolled over and went back to sleep. Hmph. So I went back to staring at the monitor until I drifted off to dreams of me smuggling Phoebe around in a bookbag to hide her from antique theifs...go figure...she woke up again crying at about 4:00, and I put Flash Gordon to shame on the way to her room. Paci fell out, Mommy- I'm on it, Baby Pie! She continued to fuss and thrash around a bit, so I sat down in the nursing chair to wring my hands and worry about whether I would be a bad mom if I just grabbed her and snuck her back into the pack 'n play next to our bed...when Matt woke up and saw her there in the morning, I could pretend that it was some sort of manifestation of her mutant powers, that in fact she flew back in to our room during the night, that I knew nothing about it...sounded beleiveable...and BAM! I woke up at 6:30 in the chair to crying baby! I FELL ASLEEP in her time of need? What a schmuck! Oh wait- it's just time to eat! Whew- close call- I probably almost traumatized her for life there. She had her bottle and went right back to sleep, while I slunk dejectedly back to bed to cuddle up in an upright position next to the monitor...seems that she did just fine in her crib...without me. She didn't wake up any more in there than she would have if she were right next to me...I should be happy about this, right? So why do I feel rejected? :( Oh well- little Baby Pie is growing up. Sniff, sniff.
Well, we did it! Last night was Phoebe's first night...gulp...alone...sniff...in her crib...aaaggghhh! This was the first time she hasn't been within arm's length of me during the night since she was born! I was so nervous: what if her pacifier fell out? Who would reach over in a sleepy haze and shove it back in? What if she woke up scared and cried? Who would reach over in a sleepy haze and hold her hand? What if she coughed or sneezed or farted- who would hear her and peek over the side of the crib and check to make sure everything was ok? The video monitor IS awesome, but if only there was a teleporter attached...pause to cry and ask Matt a hundred times if everything would be ok...and cry some more...it acutally went really well, from Phoebe's perspective: I put her down at about 11:30, ran back to our bedroom, propped myself up on the pillows into a semi-sitting position so that my eyeballs were only a few inches away from the video monitor, cranked up the volume so I could hear each breath, and stared...and stared...and stared...until I somehow drifted off. She woke up and cried a little at 1:30, at which point I bolted out of bed, scooped up the pacifier, and had it back in her mouth in about 1.5 seconds...cry it out- ha! I hovered around the door to her room, wringning my hands, secretly hoping just a little bit that she would wake up again crying so I could have a good excuse to scoop her up and hold her and keep her safe...but she rolled over and went back to sleep. Hmph. So I went back to staring at the monitor until I drifted off to dreams of me smuggling Phoebe around in a bookbag to hide her from antique theifs...go figure...she woke up again crying at about 4:00, and I put Flash Gordon to shame on the way to her room. Paci fell out, Mommy- I'm on it, Baby Pie! She continued to fuss and thrash around a bit, so I sat down in the nursing chair to wring my hands and worry about whether I would be a bad mom if I just grabbed her and snuck her back into the pack 'n play next to our bed...when Matt woke up and saw her there in the morning, I could pretend that it was some sort of manifestation of her mutant powers, that in fact she flew back in to our room during the night, that I knew nothing about it...sounded beleiveable...and BAM! I woke up at 6:30 in the chair to crying baby! I FELL ASLEEP in her time of need? What a schmuck! Oh wait- it's just time to eat! Whew- close call- I probably almost traumatized her for life there. She had her bottle and went right back to sleep, while I slunk dejectedly back to bed to cuddle up in an upright position next to the monitor...seems that she did just fine in her crib...without me. She didn't wake up any more in there than she would have if she were right next to me...I should be happy about this, right? So why do I feel rejected? :( Oh well- little Baby Pie is growing up. Sniff, sniff.
2 comments:
Awwww! I think you were more upset then she was! Feebz is getting big, but she'll always be your baby pie!
The funny part - as i was reading that, I could totally hear you telling me that story.
:-)
Yeah, she's getting so big!! She's done a great job in there all week- I hope she keeps it up! (Even though I miss her when I wake up in the night...) :)
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